We sail 100nm overnight to our first stop in the Bahamas, Acklins Island. Being pregnant on a boat, you can imagine it can make any slight feelings of morning sickness or nausea amplify. So on this trip, I was feeling very nauseous the whole time and basically didn’t leave my little sleeping spot in the saloon other than to make a mad dash to the back of the boat. I’ve had a pretty sweet ride so far, but sometimes when it gets tough it makes you not so keen for the next trip and you wonder how you will ever continue. The second Trimester is supposed to be easier, right?
When we finally arrive you will be pleased to meet some other salty sailors and explore the Glorious Acklins Island with us ?? Videos made with love, Elayna.
00:00 Airline Food – They Wouldn’t Want to Know
00:32 Like A Wave – Cat Clyde
01:25 Four Seasons – II Chitarrista del SabatoPro
07:26 Superficial Spectacle – Sea Foam Sweater Girl
09:44 Devil Like Me – Cover by Elayna C
11:24 Un-friend – Ronjo V
14:40 Home – Hollow Coves
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Videos made by Elayna, starring Riley!!
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Here is my humble advise: “one day at a time” That is so cliche I know but coming from someone or I should say, from 1/2 of a couple that had the same surprise, unplanned but not un-welcomed. You deal with it and deal with everything associated with it as it happens. You make the time, the space, the sickness, the loneliness, the trepidation, the every little thing you can think of work and then you look back and say to each other; “what the hell did we even talk about before the baby was born”? God put each of us on this earth for a finite amount of time with a blank slate, it is up to the two of you to fill the void as a family; whether on the boat or on the hard, you are a family now, bonded by the most wonderful experience you have yet to have. Embrace it, write it all down and then throw it away, because in the end no book, no other person will have the experience you are about to have.
You clearly need to slow down. All of your viewers love you, so give it a pause and film just hanging out in the Bahamas and growing a baby. Your adventures can resume afterwards. Everyone will understand.
You will need to be close for a quick run for shelter if there is a tropical thing brewing. Like Florida.
All of life’s pressures are building up and you can feel them. It’s like knowing when to reef….if you are thinking about it, you already know the answer.
This is supposed to be fun. Right? Shift gears and find the fun in a different way. It will be good practice after your baby is born, and you have to shift gears again.
Try to relax and follow your hearts. All of your true fans will want the same thing for you. I would choose Port Lacaya on Grand Bahama. Close to Freeport which is the second largest settlement in Bahamas, in case you need a little medical assistance. Quick dask over to Plan Beach for top of the line health care. Nice beaches, reefs for fishing, etc., airline service and big yards to haul out. Freeport is a big dirty city, but you can be happy just a few miles away from the noise.
I live near Fort Myers, Florida and can run over in my small twin engine plane if E gets in trouble.
There is no such thing as a perfect lifestyle. You seem to have hit on something that works for you. It puts you into interesting situations and places but has its down sides. Missing friends and family is hard but you have your own lives to live also.
Some people in your situation get around it by time off the boat. Annual trips home for several months can do a lot to get a better balance. Documenting this as you do for your boating experiences would add another dimension that could enrich and broaden your story. Your lives are gong to change anyway with child(ren), so think laterally and grow with that. See it as an opportunity, not a problem.
if u need a nanny let me know lol reely like watching u guys please dont stop being parents will come naturley dont worry keep up the good work and cant wait for little riley to get here your friend brad littig
Slow down. Get your sleep and stay healthy.
Stop the sailing for a small bit after having the baby, then do a trial to start back up again. see how it goes. Only you are in control of what you decide to do next…Keep you gear in check and up to date while not sailing. Good Luck!!
what is on your head ?
stay safe and thank you for all that you do i love watching your videos.
Hey Guys. As a pediatrician my encouragement would be to have a home base for a while. Moor La Vagabond in one particular harbor . Make that your home port for a particular amount of time then sail to another port . That way Alayna feels better during the pregnancy….best of luck during the next two trimesters. Alayna , The Nausea should start to ease now. Good luck. Dr Steve
Here is some advise:
– everything will seem like “the end of the world” to Elayna. Although it won’t be…Riley, treat it as if it is “the end of the world”. After all the hormones settle back into their rightful places she will realize it wasn’t “the end of the world”, but it will happen again with the next baby and so on. It’s just better to roll with it.
– Elayna, if you think you’re clumsy now, it will be nothing compared to the 3rd trimester, so BE CAREFUL walking around the boat, especially if you are underway.
After the arrival of your precious package
– Enjoy EVER second with your baby. Even the diaper changes. Diaper changes will be extra exciting if it’s a boy…never assume you are quick enough to get the diaper on and closed before the next wee.
– Nursing is such an incredible experience for us moms. I’m sure you are aware of all the benefits of nursing so I won’t go into details about it. ALSO, if you are unable to nurse, DON’T beat yourself up about it. Sometimes things don’t go as we would like and it’s important to be able to accept it and move on.
-I’m sure you heard you will not be getting any sleep…IT’S TRUE. I think because I heard it so much I thought I was prepared…a person can never be prepared for that kind of sleep deprivation. So SLEEP WHEN THE BABY IS SLEEPING! I’m serious. I thought I would use that time to do a load of laundry or clean and it wasn’t until I did what I was told to do (sleep when the baby is sleeping) that I started feeling like a normal human again.
-Be prepared for the hormone imbalance. Everything made me cry (like a Hallmark card). Luckily I didn’t have depression, but friends of mine did. The good thing is it normally only last until you get your first menstrual cycle after the delivery.
Godspeed on this blessed adventure!
A third person onboard to help with the baby will be almost required I suspect, particularly with lack of sleep becoming more of an issue . First thing I ask new parents is ‘Are you gettng any sleep yet?’ Ususally the answer is no.
Hang in there as long as you can. As much as I (we) love following you the urge to settle-in somewhere will continue to grow in you both, and there will come a day when you decide to do just that, and that’s OK. At some point in the future you’ll pick up the ball and get back into it, and we’ll be right here waiting!
Hello, from QLD Australia
Activity/work in the morning with rest in the heat of the day was successful for my wife during pegnancy and travel as contractors in remote arrears.
Basically, eating when hungry and sleeping when tired.
Hi team. I’m 60 now and I’ve been living on board for 15 years, plus sailing half way around Aussie. Now, being pregnant naturally means hormones kick in and the nesting instinct grows. Perfectly normal. Thing is, you have your sailing family, your internet family and your at home family, so you two are three times better off than most. How about setting up internet chat for Alayna and yourself, to better reconnect at this great time. A baby will sleep just fine in a elongated cut in half large fender. They don’t eat much, and sleep most of the time. And, when they start to talk, they never shut up… they adore being around adults, and the sailing fraternity has kids on board, all over the world… What a magical upbringing.
Good luck with the nausea Elayna! I’ve just had a baby, she’s almost 8 weeks, so the pregnant months are still fresh in my mind! You’ll most likely want somewhere to hang out during the final trimester where you have everything you need for birth and living close by and you don’t have to do much if you get too exhausted and uncomfortable. It’s been really interesting seeing how you’re coping so far, you’re doing brilliantly! I was incredibly lethargic throughout most of it, but so much worse towards the end (although I did have a bun that decided to grow huge making it harder!) So my advice would be to be ready in case of anything! And don’t stress if you do find it hard. It is hard, but you’re doing great!
I found it amusing with you saying about looking forward to it talking though, and that it wouldn’t be doing much early on. At almost 8 weeks this little one is getting so much more aware and entertaining, and hard work!
Oh, also, think about how much stuff you’re going to need, then double it! At least! I think baby things multiply when you’re not looking!!
And Riley – get used to being a servant for a while!
Hi there you two ..
Firstly compliments to your hard work, and tenacious approach.
Even on our short cruises we’re dead!!? Don’t know how you keep your smile’s??
Seriously though it is visable Riley ‘s fatigue…and how he misses Elyna’s valuable assistance. (The importance of a crew)! You could get one of your Patron’s to assist sailing to your destination if Elyna could cope but I feel like other followers, may be it’s time to slow up and enjoy a pad which is yours for a while otherwise you’ll kill the enjoyment of S/v La Vagabonde.
Four years is a good run, life will be a little different with your baby so may be if not physically, but also mentally rest is on top of your priority list!.
My sympathy to dear Elyna for the nausea! Something I remember very well and will never forget ?? Up to 5-6th months of pregnancy. !!?
Rest and sleep is fundamental!
You are in a magnificent area … Enjoy
Take care and keep safe!
Lol Foggi (Fiona)!
It’s difficult to give you guys any advice about this, I am a sailor half of my life on Ocean going Tugboats and pipe laying barges and the last 5 years on yachts.
If I was in your position, with a girlfriend expecting a baby, I would sail back to Australië and give Elayna the rest that she obviously needs and the peace of mind that she will have if she’s close to Family and friends and medical help.
It’s better for you as well, knowing that help is just a phone call away
Regarding Morning sickness / nausea prevention , there is a plethora of options,,,,both over the counter and prescription.
An online search will enlighten you ( as it did me ).
If you like, give me a mail address of your next port of call and I will mail you some. Give me some options on what you prefer.
Best bet is to get a DR prescription and obtain the good stuff.
Slow down. You’re in the bahamas, 700 islands not too far apart. Trouble is only 30 are inhabited, so watch your provisions.
Wasn’t that long ago you did a 4wd adventure, given some of the countries you have visited maybe a camper van tour might be easier.
Hello! I’m from CT and I love watching your videos! My boyfriend and I have been sailing together for the last 2 years – mostly just up and down the Long Island Sound on the shoreline of CT/NY- you should check out some pictures- it’s beautiful but certainly not nearly as beautiful as the rest of the world!
I have a 9 year old daughter that has been also sailing with us. The advice I would give you is this- there isn’t one way to parent, everyone has their own style. You have to figure out what your goals are for your own individual family. It’s easy for people to judge but I can certainly tell your from experience that as long as the two of you are on the same page, everything will be fine. Make sure you continue to communicate through the difficult times- tired, not feeling well, etc. – it’s never going to be easy so you just have to push through the hard times and the good days will always outnumber the bad.
Having a newborn will be the most difficult experience of your life- it’s a challenge you can’t prepare for, no matter how many books you read or what advice people give you. You will be the most tired you’ve ever been in your entire life. The baby needs you 24 hours a day/7 days a week. You will not get a break. Even when you have some alone time you will be worrying or thinking about the baby. This is ALL normal and we all experience it. No matter how hard the first 6 months are, just remember this: IT DOES GET BETTER!
Holding your baby and seeing him/her smile will be the most rewarding experience of your entire life. So no matter how frustrated you get – just keep at it and eventually you will get into a routine that works for your family and you’ll be the happiest you’ve ever been having that baby by your side 🙂
One thing I would strongly suggest is reading up on teaching good sleeping habits. The baby will need a very dark space with either a sound machine or some type of lullaby music so he doesn’t get woken up. I was really crazy about making sure my daughter slept through the night- some babies just don’t sleep but I think if you stay on a routine and make a cozy space the baby will eventually learn good sleeping habits. I used the cry it out method and that seemed to work. I also did not co-sleep and i think that made my daughter very independent. She always slept through the night (after 6 months obviously) and a lot of my Mom friends that co-slept or kept running in every time the baby cried- their kids don’t sleep well or they all end up in their beds in the middle of the night. Getting a good sleep is so important so I would make that a top 3 priority when you are thinking about where to live for the first 6 months.
You’ll do great! Don’t stress too much! As long as the two of you stay strong and communicate and help each other out- you will do just fine! Everyone is nervous int he beginning 🙂 xoxoxo
That was a beautiful and moving video – thank you!
Elayna, so good to see you laughing! You look lovely!
As to advise, I agree with Dr Steve, adding to it that I think you should go to Australia to share this amazing time of you lives, welcoming little Sailor or Girl into the world, with family and friends.
Love and hugs, my Friends
I agree with Dr Steve. During this time it is really important to have a stress free, or as little stress as possible, and finding a lovely little harbour that you can stay in and find a bit of a community consisting of both sailors and land-based people is important for both of you.
Stress can cause hormonal surges which can affect the fetus and not in a good way so it is really wise to find a little piece of paradise with a support system around you at least until the baby comes.
I would be very cautious about using meds for nausea and seasickness.
I have circumnavigated short-handed on our little sailboat with my husband/co-skipper and also raised a child as a single mum but not both at the same time. Each had its challenges and I’m not sure how I would have coped doing both at the same time. Keeping things as calm and stress free as possible is the most important thing you can do for the baby right now.
Interesting times ahead for you for sure.
Hi Riley and Elayna, As far as advice goes, I think I would echo what Dr. Steve had to say. I would pick a place where you want the baby to be born and stay there for a while. You could always do shorter trips for a while as things permit. Good luck to you both.
Be encouraged! This too will pass and there will soon be a beautiful little baby in your life and the family grows! Slow down and find a pace that your hearts love. You are blessed in incredible portion and all of us who watch you are thankful. ~ Strength and honor, Guy
I’m a midwife, mother of twins and a sailor. I’d advise to cut down on the stress and if that means giving up on the sailing life for a while and becoming livaboards in a marina where you can lay down some roots and contacts, then do it. La Vagabonde is a very comfortable vessel to live on for the next six to nine months, but avoid long sails (maybe just gentle day sails and return to the marina at night).
The nausea should pass by 20 weeks (I know all about that!), but the fatigue will remain I’m afraid. It’s a wonderful time of your lives – embrace it.
Can’t recommend any marinas in north Caribbean/Florida (have only sailed in the Med and Grenadines), but am quite sure there are many which tick all your boxes. Good Luck!
Well, I”ve never had one but, bruce lee in his many books says if you have a problem sit with it. John lennon took time to make homemade bread. As Elayna said you are both going to be able to be there for your kid. Count your blessings and do what you decide is right as you always do. Even I know that you are both equal to any task. These all seem like platitudes so here’s the big one always believe in your selves have the confidence that no one will ever steer you better in life, remember you are the one whose advise you know you can trust. Peace Steve
I’m watching your videos nearly since the beginning. Our paths crossed in 2015 in the caribbian sea, but we didn’t know each other.
In the past I traveled a lot, the longest time was one year in a row. At the beginning I found it very exciting to get to know new places again and again. I traveled very fast. But at the time there was a change step by step, and I stayed longer and longer in one place. The reason was, that I realized for myself, that the most intense experiences were only in connection with people, with friends.
Since I’m watching your videos, I’m wondering and discussing with my wife, when the point is coming, that you will look behind that what you are doing. Just travelling – to see one place by another place – is like consuming. At the end it is not satisfying at all. You will search for a deeper meaning …
Okay, now I like to say, that you are doing a great job, because many people are watching your videos and cheer with you. You bring a little daydreaming in there lives. And I think there are many people who follow you, only because of you.
But for you it’s time to look further into the future. I think you both will find the right answer. You are great sailors and you have extensive knowledge about sailing and all the places where you have been. There are enough options to live in a fixed location, together with family and friends. Adelaide is located at the ocean …
I’have two kids and I can’t imagine, that they are mooving all the time around, they also need friends and family.
Good luck and wise decisions.
.. and thanks a lot for the videos.
Elayna & Riley-
Watched most of your videos and love what you are doing.
You guys asked for feedback about “what would you do if you were us and pregnant on the boat”. Well, I have 2 small kids and sail but am land-based in the Chesapeake. Been working on the boat and business more lately than sailing. Anyway, my free advice is worth what I’m charging but I would find a good home-base with good hospitals etc and somewhere around the 6 month point of the pregnancy, would go park there for a while. That adds safety for anything odd that might develop late pregnancy, reduces chance of mishaps since the boat would not be moving and will give you some prep-time to kid-proof the boat. The reality is kids change EVERYTHING but for the better. Sailing is not over by any means, but it will change. That said, my son was overnighting in the v-berth at 1 month old. Once Jr is born, if it were me and my wife, I’de hang around the same home-base marina as pre-birth and start working in some day-sails, short overnights but get use to the family addition where there is proper medical help and services/supplies if needed in the first month or two and let Elayna get some rest and get use to the changes. Just find your groove. Put nets on the lifelines and a baby-gate on the stairs from saloon to hulls so Jr can’t crawl up & escape. Strap a car-seat onto a settee so you can lock Jr down and see him/her from the cockpit when the boat is moving and both of you need to focus on sailing………. Go back to sailing and videos – we will all still be here. Just promise, no diaper changing shots/videos 🙂
Whatever you do, it will work out fine but thats my two cents.
S/V Play’n Hooky
I guess you guys need a little bit of time with your family and friends. Touch base fill up your batteries. Slow down for a while. The belly will get bigger and moving around will not be as comfortable… You will always return to the ocean. Because you are infected now. No shame in living on the land for a while to recharge. Wishing you all the best. Love you guys. Thank you for all your videos.
I can’t imagine that changing your lifestyle now and turning your world upside down would give you a settled secure feeling. Wherever you are situated in the world you’re going to feel overwhelmed and daunted and that’s normal. I’d be guessing it would be worse if you didn’t have your floating home, your open salty skies your sun warmed skin and your world wide support group.
Maybe just avoid the squalls and swells and make sure you both get sleep.
From experience, I can say you can’t even predict what you will feel when you hold your own hand-made human in your arms.
Hi Riley and Elayna, I was touched by your latest video and thought I would right a few words about life in general. I’m 64 and recently retired with Annie, we have 3 kids, now in their 30s, and (almost) 5 grandkids. As you’ve said, life just seems to happen and at the time you will know it’s the right thing to do. We’re Canadian and lived in the big city but loved to take off on weekends to cottage country to swim, sail, and get back to nature. The cottage was just a cottage but we went year ’round stoking a wood fire to stay warm in winter with no running water (if you know what I mean). When our kids were born, we went right back up to the cottage the following weekend so had 6 and 10 day old babies up north living and learning our lifestyle in winter. The 3rd was lucky because he was born in summer. haha! The thing we learned raising these kids was how adaptable they are. Right through to their teenage years they loved the cottage and now, with their own kids, guess who is back packing in their playpens and bags for weekend and holiday visits. I say all this because I see you folks now in the same position as we were. Your boat is big and beautiful and you will easily accommodate the new little one as part of your lifestyle. Make no mistake, life as you know it will change! haha! But it will be even better and richer than before and there is no reason why you cannot continue sailing and working with your viewers as you have. Like most of us, work/play compromises will be made to ensure the kid(s) get the attention and love they deserve but we found it to be a natural accommodation that we did willingly. But we did it as part of our lifestyle and it continues to this day. Bottom line, keep going if you want to and love it. Have fun! Cheers, Peter and Annie
On average, most of liveboards spend about three months in a place before moving to another one. For some reason, you seem to be rushing from one place to another. But let’s face it, it’s no fun to be anchored in a bay for weeks at a time. It can get very boring and you can’t always be on shore. If in a marina, costs are prohibitive. That said, I’d be curious to know how many days in a year you spend at sea, how many days at anchor and how many days in a marina or on shore (hôtel, home, etc).
Regarding the baby, two thoughts :
A- Think well where you want the baby to be born. The place of birth will follow him or her for the rest of his/her life. Either to obtain official papers, apply for a job in many years from now, etc, the place of birth has a definite value.
B- Travelling with a child is great, but make sure you won’t f…k up his/her roots and values. Personnally, I suffered from my dual roots. I grew up in one country while the rest of the family was from the other place (except my parents). It got me confused sometimes and never felt at home once for all. Even today, 50 years later, some girlfriend can “kindly” remind me that I’m different, to be polite. That said, today, yes, I enjoy beeing different…
Back to the boating life, when the boat becomes a burden (or is suddenly too small or too shaky), my suggestion is to rent a place for a few days or even a week or 2. It makes a big difference to cut the sailing life with some vacation here and there, and then, it feels good to be back home on the boat. I presume you probably have now a comfortable monthly budget than 5 years ago and can afford it. If not, let us know, I’m sure 500 of us can send 5$ a month !
Awesome Videos. My sister made it on the water for 15 years and raised two boys, sailing around the world. The decision to move onto land was difficult, but needed to happen, especially for my nephews. I’ve loved following your adventures through the years and proudly display the “Sailing with LaVagabonde ” S L V on my truck and personal aircraft. Good luck with your future plans. Mr. Cory
Him guys! My advice for oncoming parents in your situation? Well, just do what you’re comfortable with, piepels. We haven’t had a baby while sailing, but emigrated to the edge of the Amazon jungle when our three kids were younger (they are adults now) and did a lot of traveling with them, even when they were babies, and we took them with us in a belly bag when I had a gig somewhere (we just put ear buds in their ears), took them to the Ukraine when the second nuclear reactor of Tjernobyl had some bad behavior, and lot’s of other things. No problem. They loved it. And we loved (and love) them to bits!
Don’t allow this new situation to rule your whole life. Yes, things will change when you get children, but nowadays people’s life totally revolves around babies and little children, which is rediculous.
You guys undoubtly will love your baby, and it is great to have kids, so enjoy it to the fullest, put him or her full with love, invest time and attention in your child, but never let a child rule your life, because that’s the best way to create little monsters.
And most of the time children are more flexible than us, adults, so don’t think they can’t handle your sailing lifestyle. And something else, don’t use the baby as an excuse for – if you are honest to yourself – non related things, like wanting to go back home. Or like giving in to your fears for hurricanes (because you want to “protect the baby”).
I can imagine that you guys miss your family and friends, so if you want to go back home, just sail home and enjoy your friends and family. Yes, you are that famous sailing couple that everybody expects to sail forever. But so what? It’s your life, right? You don’t owe anybody anything.
Again, enjoy that baby to the fullest, folks! And if you need/want to talk some more about this, you have our email address. Oh, and by the way, my wife is a nurse, specialized in gynaecology and obstetrics 🙂
Greetingz, Wim (and Anja)
Hi, me again 🙂 Another by the way, when we did a world backpack trip once, Anja got prengnant in Thailand from our first, and we traveled on till we were in Australia. She began to become nauseous and started to develop some, how shall I call that … in our language we would say nesting urge (which is a very natural thing, by the way). And also because our motorbike got stuck somewhere in a harbour in Thailand, we decided to go back to the Netherlands and end our travels for a while. After that it took us way too long before we could “unroot” again, but we did it. Yes, I would have loved to stay in Australia and get our baby over there, but Anja felt better going back to the Netherlands, although she is absolutely no “mothers child” and she loves traveling.
Okay, greetingz again from the Azores
Get over your 1st semester. After 15 weeks you’ll feel fine and you can start sailing again!
Maybe a good time to take a break ..park the boat somewhere and come back to Australia for 2 months to allow Alayna to get over the early stages of pregnancy ?
great about ya’ll getting all the movies!! I’ve been doing it for years now. You can also get a lot of kid’s movies!! Luv to talk to you more about it. let me know.